At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Is Oprah even human
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