My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
we're so committed to being not committed
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize