But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize