We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
