Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
