She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
