Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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