we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize