DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
