I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize