So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
