u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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