i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
