Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
