Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Randomize
