yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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