I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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