She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
