I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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