So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
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