Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
