You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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