i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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