Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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