I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
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