When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
