just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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