this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
