He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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