We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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