I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize