I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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