dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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