Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
