Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
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