Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
