It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
