How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
