We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
