i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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