addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
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Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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