i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize