doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
