We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
