I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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