Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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