You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Randomize
