Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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