My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
