We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
